Via Raw Story, a mother fights for her children serving in the US military — which is more than this administration ever did.

Posted: July 31st, 2005 under General.
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Hand me the pliers!

Sorry, nothing else remotely Firesign Theatre - related about this post.

There’s a little tiff over water rights going on in Norway right now. And, because it’s Norwegians doing the squabbling, count on hardly any actual talking but a lot of fraught silences, slammed doors and solitary drunkenness. That’s how we do arguments, folks.

At least in my family’s opinion, this Voss stuff is indeed worth squabbling over. I’m about to head over to the local Costplus World Market to lay in a goodly supply.
Or maybe it’s just the way-cool bottles. Skol!

Posted: July 30th, 2005 under General.
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Looks pretty quiet out there. Mainly movie pirates and border collies vying with Elinor Donahue and …Yog-Sothoth? Well, it’s early. Jello wrestling and Popeye and Olive Oyl sex cartoons and flesh eating sores should be showing up any time now.

Posted: July 26th, 2005 under General.
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It’s been way too long since the halcyon days of Masterpiece Theater, when we could spend the entire 12 or 13 hours of “I, Claudius” basking in the horrific shenanigans going on in ancient Rome.

Gladiator and Troy and Alexander, with all their modern day big screen leeway, still can’t hold a candle to the images of horribly delicious, shocking perversity evoked by that 1976 TV miniseries. OK, well, to be fair, maybe that’s not entirely what those later films were trying for, but still isn’t it about time again that we got to watch something about ancient empires that’s interesting and witty and not just an excuse to stare at Brad Pitt’s thighs? Not that that’s not pretty good viewing, but still…

Our chance may be arriving soon. HBO and the Beeb have gone in together on a 12-hour miniseries titled ROME which will premiere in the UK this fall.

This epic is going to re-write history, says John Walsh in the Independent this week. Unprecedented realism. The producers plan to show us Rome and Romans the way they undoubtedly were in reality: an urban atmosphere of oppressive heat and eternal stench; citizens with bad teeth and bad haircuts instead of all those white marble pillars and Aqua-net coifs and perfectly pressed togas Hollywood keeps foisting on us.

I’m all for realism, but after reading this article I sincerely hope the producers decided to draw the line at showing scenes of communal defecation, an authenticated historic tradition which was apparently for the Romans a kind of meet ‘n’ greet, or rather, “shit ‘n’ shmooze” social gathering. Uh oh, I wonder how long it’ll take before the phrase “communal defecation” makes its way into my list of most popular search engine queries. It’ll have to compete with “Popeye Olive Oyl sex cartoons” and “flesh eating sores”, so it might be a while before it breaks into the top 20. Gosh, what a lot to look forward to.

UPDATE: I was so excited about ancient Roman realism when I wrote this earlier, I forgot what caught my interest in this story in the first place. That’s Irish actor Ciarán Hinds as Julius Caesar pictured above. [And here's a shout-out to the godless harlots at Hindquarters Memorial: break out the bibs and helmets, ladies!]

Actually, I have accepted Sid into my life as my personal Caesar.

Posted: July 25th, 2005 under General.
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Every Friday night is designated Choose Your Takeout night here at the remote fortified family compound we call Tildebunkport. Whichever cuisine a family member hankers for, from whatever restaurant, we’ll go there and get that even if it means circumnavigating the seven county metro area and making four separate pickups to fulfill the orders for myself and Mr. Tild and Elder and Younger Teenage Units.
The Venerable Pup doesn’t get to choose; it’s Hill’s Science Diet Light Formula Large Kibble for him 24/7, and that’s the way he likes it, thank god–you don’t want to make an 80 lb., 12-1/2 year old dog any crankier than he is already.

Yesterday for the first time in months there was a deviation from the normal Friday routine. Mr. Tild had the brainstorm that instead of going on the usual takeout circuit we should find a place with outdoor seating and enjoy an actual in-restaurant [but outdoors] dining experience. I had some reservations [Ha! Restaurant humor!] about eating outdoors on an afternoon when the temperature topped 91 degrees, but all turned out well.

We went to It’s Greek To Me, where we sat outside on the covered patio which was shady and cooled by a generous crossbreeze. Delightful. It was the first time at a Greek restaurant for the boys, so we ordered the house specialty which is like a sampler of a dozen dishes, from a flaming cheese appetizer [saganaki] all the way through to baklava and some other dessert with a name that sounded like “galactic burritos”. Everything was tremendous. We all dug in like Tom Hanks after four years stuck on a rock with nothing but seaweed to eat and a volleyball to talk to.

The boys joked that everything they know about Greece they learned from the Disney animated film “Hercules”. Mr. Tild and I trotted out a hilarious old “Nick Danger” bit:

He: “We’re going to Greece!”

She: “And swim the English Channel?”

which got nothing but blank looks from the boys. How old do you have to be to know that Channel swimmers used to put grease all over their bodies for insulation? Damn I feel old. These smart-aleck kids today with their iPods and their World War Two RPGs and their instant messaging and their wild, moonwalk breakdancing. Tsk!

The kids are actually pretty great, of course. Having been to both coasts and several major US cities, and one of them now even to Japan, they’re remarkably cosmopolitan young men, which I find extremely gratifying. There is no way in hell I would raise my children to think that the world ends where 35W changes into 35. I want them to appreciate their Norwegian heritage but also know that it’s not the only culture out there. Enjoy the lefse and the rommegrot, but don’t ignore the spanakopita and the flaming saganaki. So saith the Mom.

****

And while I’m mentioning things Norwegian, the time has finally come when we must ask ourselves: is Norwegianity not the most bloody brilliant blog on all of the Internets?
The answer, of course is “yes”.

MG the All Seeing Eye does it all: he posts an unbelievable shitload amount of content each and every day; each post a jewel of brilliant and insightful commentary. I’d link to some of them, but his ingenious, cryptic posting style often makes that impossible. He sees All and he knows All, and– better than Jim Ed Poole could ever be –he tells more than Some.

He’s the Mixmaster, who can work a Drinking Liberally crowd like a border collie on speed, herding shy people into discussion groups and jumpstarting conversations with only a well-chosen remark and a full pitcher of beer.

And as if all that wasn’t enough, he puts up a nausea-inducing, weird, challenging music set every evening to help us expand our audiophonic horizons.

Well I think a blog like that deserves more than some mild-mannered, unassuming button on a sidebar, dammit! After long months of searching I’ve finally found the pulp cover worthy of Norwegianity. Without further ado I give you:

And one more thing: I’ve sent copies of this image to several highly respectable and responsible bloggers, so that if anything should, uhhh, happen to me, this masterfully-executed art treasure will not be lost forever. Word.

Posted: July 23rd, 2005 under General.
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By Christopher Weyant, in this week’s New Yorker:

Posted: July 23rd, 2005 under General.
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Take this poll to tell Rhino which episodes of MST3K you’d most like to see in future DVD releases.

My picks:

Episode 810: THE GIANT SPIDER INVASION
Why: “Whoo! Packers win the Super Bowl!”

Episode 813: JACK FROST
Why: Our hero Ivan’s reaction when the mushroom dwarf/Tom Bombadil guy gives him a magic bow and arrow: “Wow! It barely works!”

Episode 816: PRINCE OF SPACE
Why: “Buck. Buck.”

Episode 910: THE FINAL SACRIFICE
Why: “ROWSDOWER!”

Episode 1011: HORRORS OF SPIDER ISLAND
Why: Fabulous babe Anna tells everyone that she’s from Minnesota “..and our governor’s a big bald Nazi!”

In ironically related news, the director of [MST3K Episode 811] PARTS: THE CLONUS HORROR Robert S. Fiveson may seek a federal injunction against the makers of THE ISLAND, claiming the new flick is an unabashed clone of his movie.
Why, I’ve never heard of such a thing. What impudence.

Posted: July 23rd, 2005 under General.
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Well I can tell right now that I’ve gotta go see this exhibit. Stories about it yesterday in both the Strib and the Rake, altho in this case I favor the Strib just because they included a photo of my favorite local musician. A man who, as I’ve said before, has been for nearly 30 years my own personal rock and roll savior. Yes, I’m talkin bout the Dean of Scream; the best singer and best Shinders Readmore employee Mpls has ever produced; Buzz Barker hisself; the eternally worshipped Curt Almsted:

Curtiss A : “A legend in his spare time”

Sigh.

 

Posted: July 23rd, 2005 under Curt Almsted, General.
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Drinking Liberally last night at the Muddy Pig in St. Paul

Great crowd at DL last night. Great crowd. Great mix. Great conversations. Many great bloggers. Expensive but great beer. I knew I’d had a good time when I got home and realized I was so hoarse I could barely speak above a whisper.

Pop Quiz! Who can give the correct response to the following statement:

“I’m a little hoarse from shouting”

Winner will receive a voucher good for 1 bottle of Leinie’s Honey Weiss which may be redeemed at a Twin Cities DL evening of the winner’s choosing. Leave your answer in the comments.

Posted: July 21st, 2005 under General.
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Q: Why is it traditional for people to sing a song called “Pobre de Mi” ["Poor Me"] during the annual San Fermin festival in Pamplona?

A: Hmmm. Hard to say….

Aaiiee! El toro proctologico!

Posted: July 17th, 2005 under General.
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